With these stressful times going on, it is imperative that we get clear and review all of our coping skills in order to care for ourselves so that we can do what we can in the world. With a bit of time to reflect during the holidays, take a look inside your coping toolbox.
What are you doing to show yourself love and to nurture yourself?
It's easy to find one tool that you like and get into the habit of using that all the time. Yet, if the only tool we use is a hammer, everything starts to look like a nail! Remember that we need to use all of our tools.
In times of stress and intense emotion, it can be difficult to remember all of our tools. This article is a reminder to take an inventory of all that you have and all that you can do for yourself.
Here are some behaviors that might be helpful to us to balance and nurture ourselves, especially when we are feeling emotionally overwhelmed:
1) Our breath is an incredibly important tool and always available to us. Try this particular breathing technique that can help reduce stimulation of our nervous system: inhale for 4-5 seconds, hold at the top of your breath for 3 seconds, and then slowly release with control for 5-6 seconds. Notice your body and how it feels; now try it once or twice more.
2) Physical movement is essential for our body, mind, and spirit. Try taking a walk or do some easy stretching; alternatively, clean or organize something while staying conscious of your movement. My favorite - turn on your favorite music and dance!
3) Do something creative. Creativity comes in many forms whether it be doing some kind of art like painting or coloring (there is a pix of a flower below you can download), cooking, interior or clothing design, knitting, gaming (chess anyone?), or taking on a home project. Consider how you can engage this part of your brain and use creativity for release.
4) Use your imagination. Einstein was quoted saying: "Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited, whereas imagination embraces the entire world, stimulating progress, giving birth to evolution." Take yourself to a beautiful place in your mind. There are several research studies finding that if we bring in positive past memories and/or create beautiful sceneries in our mind, it stimulates the brain in more positive ways.
5) Bring in the good - use imagination/memory to bring in positive emotions such as love, joy, gratitude, and peace. Try taking around 30-60 seconds while really feeling each emotion.
6) Try slowing down and meditating. If you are interested in some guided meditations, check out some of my free offerings:
7) Write down a list of everything you can do to uplift yourself and facilitate your self-care. When we feel emotional, it can be difficult to remember. If we have taken an inventory of our toolbox, we can be more prepared for difficult times.
Here is an example of my own toolbox list:
1) Take an epsom salt bath and lavendar
2) Clean out a drawer
3) Take a walk
4) Cuddle my dog
5) Cook and eat a healthy meal
6) Have a glass of wine (useful in moderation)
7) Color in my mandala coloring book
8) Call a friend
9) Write in my gratitude journal
10) Take a nap
11) Meditate
12) Stretch/Do Yoga
13) Write - (I am working on a new book, which calms me), express myself in a letter (it is good to express whatever emotion is coming up)
14) Have a snack
15) Have a cup of tea/coffee
16) Watch a funny show/stand up comedy
17) Get into a good story (whether reading or watching a show)
18) Play or listen to music - drum (on literally anything) or practice/begin learning an instrument
19) Moisturize - massage your hands and feet with your favorite cream
20) Do some art that expresses my inner world with symbols
21) Clean the kitchen mindfully
22) Step outside for a moment to take in the outdoors
There are so many things we can do for ourselves, this is just the beginning of an inventory of choices. Make a list for yourself on what works for you and practice varying all the behaviors on it. Be sure you are utilizing your resources!